22–24
Hermes
Madan, this discussion must cease; the jury say they do not understand word-chopping. They will now give their votes, Porch. Ah; I should have won, if I could have tried him with my third figure of self-evidents.
Hermes
Unanimous verdict for Pleasure.
Justice
By all means. Next case, Hermes.
Hermes
Luxury v. Virtue, re Aristippus; Aristippus must appear in person.
Virtue
I ought to speak first. Aristippus is mine; his words and his deeds alike proclaim him mine.
Luxury
On the contrary, any one who will observe his garlands and his purple robes and his perfumes will agree that he is mine.
Justice
Peace! This suit must stand over, until Zeus has decided the appeal re Dionysius. The cases are similar. If Porch wins her appeal, Aristippus shall be adjudged to Virtue: if not, Luxury must have him. Bring the next case. By the way, those jurors must not have their fee; they have not earned it.
Hermes
So the poor old gentlemen have climbed up all this way for nothing!
5
Justice
Well, they must be content with a third. Now go away, all of you, and don’t be cross; you shall have another chance.
Hermes
Diogenes of Sinope wanted! Bank, it is for you to speak.
Diogenes
Look here, Madam Justice, if she doesn’t stop bothering, I shall have assault and battery to answer for before long, instead of desertion; my stick is ready.
Justice
What is the meaning of this? Bank has run away, and Diogenes after her, with his stick raised. Poor Bank! I am afraid she will be roughly handled. Call Pyrrho.
