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whom he had a fancy for. All people are exclaiming that it was a most disgraceful proceeding. How many, Micio, told me of this as I was coming here? It is in everybody’s mouth. In fine, if an example must be cited, does he not see his brother
DEMEA
giving his attention to business, and living frugally and soberly in the country? No action of his is like this. When I say this to him, Micio, I say it to you. You allow him to be corrupted.
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MICIO
Never is there any thing more unreasonable than a man who wants experience, who thinks nothing right except what he himself has done.
DEMEA
What is the meaning of that?
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MICIO
Because, Demea, you misjudge these matters. It is no heinous crime, believe me, for a young man to intrigue or to drink; it is not; nor yet for him to break open a door. If neither I nor you did so, it was poverty that did not allow us to do so. Do you now
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claim that as a merit to yourself which you then did from necessity? That is unfair; for if we had had the means to do so, we should have done the same. And, if you were a man, you would now suffer that other son of yours to act thus now, while his age will excuse it, rather than, when he has got you, after long wishing it, out of the way,
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he should still do so, at a future day, and at an age more unsuited.
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DEMEA
O Jupiter! You, sir, are driving me to distraction. Is it not a heinous thing for a young man to do these things?
MICIO
Oh! do listen to me, and do not everlastingly din me upon this subject. You gave me your son to adopt;
he became mine; if he offends in any thing, Demea, he offends against me: in that case I shall bear the greater part of the inconvenience. Does he feast,Does he feast: Colman has the following observation here: The mild character of Micio is contrasted by Cicero to that of a furious, savage, severe father, as drawn by the famous Comic Poet, Caecilius. Both writers are quoted in the Oration for Caelius, in the composition of which it is plain that the orator kept his eye pretty closely on our Poet. The passages from Caecilius contain all that vehemence and severity which, as Horace tells us, was accounted the common character of the style of that author. does he drink, does he smell of perfumes,Smell of perfumes: For an account of the unguenta, or perfumes in use among the ancients, see the Notes to Bohn’s Translation of Plautus.—it is at my cost. Does he intrigue, money shall be found by me, so long as it suits me; when it shall be no longer convenient, probably he’ll be shut out of doors.Will be shut out of doors: No doubt by his mistress, when she has drained him of his money, and not by Micio himself, as Colman says he was once led to imagine.
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Has he broken open a door—it shall be replaced; has he torn any one’s clothes—they shall be mended. Thanks to the Gods, I both have means for doing this, and these things are not as yet an annoyance. In fine, either desist, or else find some arbitrator between us: I will show that in this matter you are the most to blame.
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Learn to be a father from those who are really so.
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MICIO
You are his father by nature, I by my anxiety.
DEMEA
You, feel any anxiety?
MICIO
Oh dear,—if you persist, I’ll leave you.
DEMEA
Is it thus you act?
MICIO
Am I so often to hear about the same thing?
DEMEA
I have some concern for my son.
MICIO
I have some concern for him too; but, Demea,
