Thesauros Literature satire Ἑρμότιμος ἢ Περὶ Αἱρέσεων

Ἑρμότιμος ἢ Περὶ Αἱρέσεων

Ἑρμότιμος ἢ Περὶ Αἱρέσεων Lucian of Samosata

15–16

HERMOTIMUS
I don’t see your point, Lycinus.
LYCINUS
My question was not very complicated really. There have been many philosophers—Plato, Aristotle, Antisthenes, and your own predecessors, Chrysippus, Zeno, and the rest. Now, what persuaded you to leave the rest alone and choose to base your studies on the particular one you did? Did Apollo send you back from Delphi, like Chaerephon, Chaerephon asked the oracle who was the wisest mortal and he was directed to Socrates. with his word that the Stoic school was best of all and you should go there? He has a habit of sending different people to different philosophies; he knows the one that suits each person best, I suppose.
HERMOTIMUS
It wasn’t like that, Lycinus. I never even asked Apollo about it.
LYCINUS
Did you think it not worth consulting the god about, or did you think you could make the better choice on your own without his help? 5
HERMOTIMUS
I did think so.
LYCINUS
Well then, please teach me this first, how, right at the beginning, we can distinguish the best, the true philosophy, the one we must choose, leaving aside the others.
HERMOTIMUS
I will tell you. I saw that most people took to this one, so I guessed it was the best.
LYCINUS
How many more Stoics are there than Epicureans or Platonists or Peripatetics? You obviously took a count of them as in a show of hands.
HERMOTIMUS
I didn’t count. I made an estimate.
LYCINUS
So you are not prepared to teach me. You are cheating when you tell me you decide such a matter by guesswork and weight of numbers. You’re hiding the truth from me. 5

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