Book 40
15
"My brother is not accusing me for the first time today, but it is the first time he is doing so openly, though I have done nothing to deserve it. If my father were angry with me it would be your duty, as the elder brother, to intercede for the younger to obtain pardon for my offence in consideration of my youth. Where I ought to find protection, I find a determination to destroy me. I have been dragged away whilst only half-awake from a banquet and a wine party to answer a charge of fratricide. Without advocates, without defending counsel, I am compelled to plead for myself. Had I to plead for another I should have taken time to think out and arrange my speech, and what else would be at stake but my reputation as a skilful pleader? Unaware of the reason for being summoned, I found you in an angry mood, ordering me to defend myself, and my brother making accusations against me. He delivered a carefully prepared and thought-out speech against me; I had only such time as he took to make his accusations in which to learn what the matter at issue was. What was I to do in those few moments, listen to my accuser or think out my defence? Thunderstruck by a danger so sudden and so unlooked for, I could with difficulty understand the charges brought against me, still less could I see the right way of defending myself against them. What hope would there be for me if I had not my father as my judge? If my brother has a greater share of his affection, I, who have to defend myself, ought at all events not to have a less share of his compassion. I am praying you to preserve me in your own interest as well as mine; he demands that you shall put me to death for his own security. What do you think he will do to me when you have left your crown to him, if even now he thinks it right that my life should be sacrificed for him?"
